My Dinner with Duncan
by The Autumn Witch
Summary: The future Hero of Ferelden's fateful first meal with Warden Commander Duncan.


My Dinner with Duncan

_(Excerpt from the Personal Journal of The Storm Queen of New Elvhenan) _

Many people looking back at history will inevitably label me a hero or villain or perhaps, what I would prefer, an emancipator. Regardless though, my life and therefore accomplishments could have turned out much differently and dare I say, this most likely would have been unfortunate for many people if not all the peoples of Thedas.

Please understand I am not suffering delusions of grandeur but simply stating the facts. My deeds as both the Hero of Ferelden and the Grey Warden Commander stand for themselves. I personally changed the course of history and most likely saved Thedas from a horrific blight. Despite my actions afterwards as the leader of New Elvhenan, I made the world a better and safer place. But what most people don't know is that I never had any intention of being a hero or even a soldier.

I simply wanted to be free by whatever means necessary; up to and including killing my personal liberator from the Tower of Magi. Little did I know my very first meal with Warden Commander Duncan would not only change the course of my life but the lives of uncountable others.

It's not to say I disliked the human or I had anything against him personally but until you live the life of a Circle Mage and female Elf stuck in a human world, you can't really understand what it does to you. Being under the lifelong supervision and scrutiny of the Chantry Templars changes you...no...it scars you deeply. Add to that, a memory that you can never suppress of being helplessly torn from your loving parent's arms at the tender age of six and you end up with, at best, a traumatised soul or at worst, a very twisted individual. I fell somewhere in between.

When the First Enchanter told me I was leaving the tower permanently to be a Grey Warden, all I heard was _leaving the tower permanently_. Instantly, I started making plans for my escape from Duncan as soon as we were clear of the tower. I figured I would murder him while he slept and escape into the wilderness to join a Dalish tribe never to be seen or heard of again.

Yes, I know, is does seem harsh to kill an innocent man but like I said before, you have to understand what I was escaping from.

So I secretly made my plans and waited for our first night at camp. However, when Duncan invited me over to sit with him while we ate our dinner, his words didn't so much save him as they saved me from making a tragic mistake. I still remember, as clear as day, that fateful, dinner conversation that changed my world forever.

After he motioned for me to sit by him, I quickly obliged as I was used to the harsh orders of the Templars. I simply acted out of habit and joined him by the fire.

Looking at me and smiling he said, "This must all seem very strange to you I imagine?"

Nodding my head in silent agreement I simply smiled back.

"Gallia you can talk. I want you to talk. I want you to think for yourself and not just jump at my orders. You may be on the way to become a Grey Warden but you are your own person. You're allowed to speak your mind."

I just eagerly shuck my head in affirmation again.

This time he actually laughed softly before replying, "Look, there is so much more to being a Grey Warden than just following orders. Yes discipline and the ability to work together is good but you also need to be able to think for yourself and follow your gut when need be and most importantly, you have to think when other people are reacting out of blind fear. We are the difference between catastrophe and victory. We are the thin wall between humanity and apocalypse. Do you understand?"

This time I really took in his words before I answered. Eventually I spoke, "I think so but it may take me some time to really comprehend the freedom to act on my own."

Getting more animated he quickly replied, "Ah! But that is the thing! You already do know how to think on your own. Not only did you pass your harrowing in record time but you knew to tell the First Enchanter about Jowan's plan even though you knew Jowan would see it as a betrayal. Not only did you make decisions in both circumstances but you made the right decisions. And for someone as young and let's face it, as traumatised as you, this was remarkable indeed."

I had to think about his words even as his eyes cautiously observed me. Could he possibly be right? Could I actually be one of the fabled Grey Wardens? I felt my heart take notice.

As I looked up at him to reply he spoke again, "Don't think I don't know what you're thinking. This isn't my first time freeing a Mage. You want to escape don't you? You might even be planning on killing me to hide your escape as long as possible. Correct?"

I deeply blushed and quickly looked at the ground as an easy escape from his soulful eyes. Then I became aware of Duncan's rough but immensely strong and warm hand gently pulling my chin up so that I would be looking at him directly in the eyes. I will never forget how much strength I felt behind his tender but firm touch. Still, to this day, it is the only time I willingly let a man touch me.

Now speaking in a much more serious tone he said, "Gallia I will not stop you if you want to escape. I won't even report you because I have higher calling than the Chantry's petty control issues. But before you go, just think about this.

All your life you have been kicked around, insulted and I am sure things so awful it boggles the mind. But most importantly, the Templars have been telling you your whole life you're an aberration to the Maker and not worthy of the basic respect most people give their dogs. But...but...this is your chance. This is YOUR chance to announce to the world with thunder and lightning that you are indeed better than all of your jealous, inconsequential detractors would have you be. You have this chance to show the world that a Mage, an Elf and a woman cannot only change the world but literally help save the world as well. You can take this chance and show them you will not let their insignificant little philosophy define who you are or what you are capable of. And when you take that chance and when you prove them wrong you will become a role model for years to come for all those people who have been trampled on their whole lives. You will give so many people hope."

I was having trouble taking all his words in but somewhere deep down a light began to glow. This light that I had been suppressing my whole life was filling me with something I had never felt. It wasn't quite pride but more the anticipation of becoming more than the sum of my parts in order to help those like me. It was something I had never considered and soon I was glowing with emotion.

Continuing Duncan asked, "So Gallia I ask you this. Are you strong enough to do this with me, with us and the whole word? Because once you don the blue and silver you step into a brotherhood and sisterhood that isn't satisfied with just being the bravest and best soldiers in Thedas. We settle for nothing less than grabbing fate by the throat and saying, we will not bend to your will as we change the course of fate every time we show up for battle."

Hearing the genuine love he had for the Grey Wardens and looking into those deep, piercing eyes I knew I would not be making any escape attempts that night or ever. From that night on I dedicated myself not just to the Grey Wardens but to making...no demanding...the world take notice of me as I made the world a better place for all those who had no one to speak for them.

So as you see, Duncan's brief but heartfelt words not only changed me but as history shows they changed the world for us all. And all of this due to being invited to join someone's simple dinner around a lazy, camp fire.

And so we come to my final words to those reading this. Don't just hear the word's of others but listen to them and you might find that, perhaps, fate is not as fickle as we believe her to be. Perhaps.

FINIS


End file.
